Opinion: I feel its time to make you smile...laugh!

It hit me, up until now my words have been food for thought and food to inspire. Today I provide the dish to make you laugh, or at least smile, contrary to the article's title. There is no set order or method to my collected humour (I call it it quirky research) I am just providing you with something to make your belly jiggle and a reason to crack your chapped lips this autumn, although it feels like winter.

Please remember that the following are quotes, statements and acts have been stated and taken from a number of websites.

As usual, all comments are welcome. Have a great weekend in advance!!! xox

Rob Swainson, 26, of Bournemouth who has no belly button.

"I thought about having one constructed when I was getting interested in girls, but not for long," he says, adding that people are more surprised by his scar than his lack of a navel. "You only have to look at Michael Jackson to realise it's probably best to live with what you've got."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/magazine/7738144.stm

News in the making

News Bloopers Collection of news bloopers from around the world. Watch at 1.28, hillarious.

Miss Alabama in the 1994

Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were
supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live
forever, which is why I would not live forever,"


Miss USA contest.

http://www.voshy.com/jokes/view.php?id=10048

This collection of partial statements has been collected from REAL insurance claim forms submitted to insurance companies by members of the public.

When an innocent victim is involved
- The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.
- The pedestrian had no idea which way to run as I ran over him.
- A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
- I saw her look at me twice. She appeared to be making slow progress when we met on impact.

Who is to Blame?
- An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
- I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.
- The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.
http://www.slinkycity.com/funny-insurance-claims.html

Dont laugh, its a serious matter!!



WHAT CAN WE SAY ABOUT THIS ONE? Did you catch it?

The following are allegedly real courtroom questions and witness statements

Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? (no response needed)

Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk, in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, never the less?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practising law somewhere.
http://www.businessballs.com/courtroom.htm

Look around before ..............



Have a grand weekend, and God bless you !!!